Her body had felt strange, yes. But now, so did her mind. Just as soon as she had shaken off the seasickness and felt she could join the others to carry on her duties, these new attacks started to interfere with her concentration, and then her ability to function at all. It was almost like the seasickness triggered this new feeling. To Digambar, it was especially worrying because she hadn’t felt this way during other exoports. Moreover, the other crew didn’t feel this way at all. The rest of them had recovered from the grueling pangs of seasickness. They were carrying out their responsibilities – and hers – without complaint.
They had already begun practicing with the sextant to master the celestial navigation so critical to an event where the ship’s systems were damaged. Beyond that, they were indulging in their exposure to earthsense. They shared these moments together and struggled to tamp down all the urges that bubbled up inside their teeming bodies. It was a special time of discovery and pleasure. The exosouls reveled in experiential bliss, indulging the nuances of an uncanny physic obscured from their lives, manipulating a life abandoned by their people in a fleeting present categorically foreign from their own.
Both Calliope and Arman had explained to her that sometimes, exosouls can require longer adjustment periods. “Each body is different,” Arman had told her. “The soul and the body are at odds in the beginning, but eventually they get along.”
Digambar knew that the sensations had been growing since her training began at Yellow Reserve, but they were subtle before, and she had attributed them to the earlier afflictions that were expected to have dissipated by now. She thought they were simply aftereffects from the initial shock of exoporting, like sore muscles after an extended hike. The ringing in her ears, the stiffness in her spine, the aching in the roots of her teeth. She had been so eager to get underway, that she rebuffed these signals. She refused to raise them to Arman during the daily check-ins. At night, when she lay on the thin mattress of the Yellow Reserve exosoul quarters, she was only slightly fearful that those early struggles might worsen at sea. Now, those worries were realized.