Albert Camus

Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Saying “I Love You” and Not Getting it Back - The Edge Of Something More by Andi Loveall

After a nasty breakup, twenty-two-year-old Devin Ashford is on a mission to travel the world one random excursion at a time. He wants to forget his ex, discover new experiences and end up with some awesome stories to tell. If it takes spending all of his savings to do it, he is ready.

Publication date: October 13th, 2015

After a nasty breakup, twenty-two-year-old Devin Ashford is on a mission to travel the world one random excursion at a time. He wants to forget his ex, discover new experiences and end up with some awesome stories to tell. If it takes spending all of his savings to do it, he is ready.

His first stop is a communal homestead in the Appalachians of North Carolina, which turns out to be a bohemian paradise. The weed is plentiful, the owners adore him, and the very sight of Cora, their nineteen-year-old goddaughter, makes him want to set up a permanent camp.

Cora warns that she isn’t ready for a serious relationship, but Devin is falling hard. Playful kisses turn into passionate sex, and each day is spent connecting and enjoying the mind-numbing awesomeness—until he makes the mistake of saying “I love you.” Discussing the future kills the good vibes, and Cora pushes him away.

Pissed off and rejected, Devin begins preparing for his next excursion: backpacking India. But just when it’s time to go, the death of one of the homestead’s beloved animals leaves Cora upset and in need of a friend. Devin’s kindness wins him another shot at romance.

With a plane ticket in hand and his pride on the line, Devin and Cora find themselves teetering on the edge of something more.

That Painful Moment: Saying “I Love You” and Not Getting it Back

People have different views on the phrase “I love you” in a relationship. To some, it’s a milestone that comes before living together, after the first kiss, and indicates that a lifelong commitment is in the works. For others, it’s a more casual, general sort of love. Some people say it because they feel they’re supposed to. Others have an issue saying or hearing it at all, fearing that it means something they can’t handle. 

I Love You: A Three-word Anxiety Attack

With all of these conflicting views, deciding when to say “I love you” can be anxiety provoking. A lot of people would argue that you should say it whenever it feels right, but as Devin learns in EDGE OF SOMETHING MORE, that doesn’t always go so well. If you and your partner are in the same place, it can be a beautiful moment. But what if your partner:

1. Is overwhelmed and afraid that it won’t be possible to meet your needs?
2. Has been hurt by, or has hurt, a romantic partner before?
3. Isn’t as invested in the relationship as you are? 

There are many reasons why this situation can quickly turn ugly. Be compassionate to your partner’s position. The same goes if you’re the one who can’t say “I love you.” Be honest and speak from the heart, and what’s right for you will become clear. 

Taking the Weirdness off the Table: The Open “I Love You” 

I have a lot of anxiety and can’t handle weirdness, so I like to tell partners that I love them right from the beginning. I’m a guarded person and you pretty much have to make me love you to get me to date you in the first place. Plus, I tell my friends I love them, so to me, it’s not a big deal. If you can say it like “I love you, you’re an awesome person” versus “I love you, we are definitely getting hitched one day,” it won’t be as big of a deal, and conversations about where the relationship is going can be more focused on communicating exactly what you both want. 

Just remember, someone can say the words ten times a day, but if they treat you like shit, they don’t love you. The same goes for being kind and wonderful in every way but having a block with the words. Only you can decide what love means and what you’re willing to compromise for it. People are always growing, and not hearing the words today doesn’t mean you never will. Instead of taking it personal, ask how your partner does feel—and really listen.

Thanks so much to Mythical Books for having me! And thanks for checking out EDGE OF SOMETHING MORE!
About the author:
Andi Loveall grew up in the blistering heat of California’s Central Valley and has since traveled far and wide in search of adventure and romance. From the steamy streets of Bangkok to the dancing fireflies of the Appalachians, the places, people and things she has seen have convinced her of two things: Life hurts no matter where you go, and the world is a crazy-beautiful place.

A freelance writer by day and storyteller by night, Andi is on a mission to create characters that come alive in worlds she can’t quite reach. When she’s not writing, she’s usually hula hooping, dying her hair bright colors or making delicious home-cooked meals for herself and the people that she loves.

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Fee Roberts said...

Poor Devin. It seems he falls too hard too fast.

Unknown said...

Great post, thank you!

Bridgett Wilbur said...

This book sounds great and I would love to read it. ty

Jan Lee said...

I read an excerpt of this book on a different site and it sounds amazing. I'd love to do what the main character does in leaving his job and helping to set up a farm, traveling around, sounds wonderful to me :)

Stephanie LaPlante said...

Sounds interesting

nurmawati djuhawan said...

thx u for hosting :)

wendy Hutton said...

sounds like a great read thanks

Juana said...

I can't wait to read this story. I like the gorgeous book cover.

SamyP said...

Sounds like a great read