will they be stuck in the past? - Thirst Trap by Zachary Ryan

"t was enjoyable, engrossing, emotional (be prepared), and I had a hard time putting it down. Each character has their time in the spotlight, and no one overshadows another. It's a story about growing up, coming of age, and so much more. You have to read this one for yourself." Maria V., Goodreads

Description:

Published: November 4th, 2019

Tragedy comes in all forms, and you never know how you’ll deal with it. Four friends have all dealt with their fair share of struggles. Dillion, an aspiring writer with writers block because of his brothers sudden death, Jesse the emotional stunted drink thanks to his boyfriend’s suicide, Ivan the abused victim just looking for a place to call home, and Leo the stubborn romantic trying to get his friends to open up, while keeping his issues close to his chest.

With these four friends, they avoid all their elephants in the room like a death card agreement between Dillion and Jesse, Ivan completely hoping his abusive lover with change or even Leo focusing on his friends problems instead of his own. Can these four friends learn to embrace and accept their own tragedy or will they be stuck in the past?

Thirst Trap is a humorous coming of age novel dealing with sexuality, tragedy, substance abuse, and the most beautiful insane friendships. 

EXCERPT

I walked around the bar with my drink trying to ignore the stares. It wasn’t like I was leaving much to the imagination by only wearing sneakers and a g-string. I rolled my eyes and tried not to punch people when they grabbed me, or were asking for me to take my only clothing off. I had to remember that this was paying the bills and my workshops that I never went to.

 I continued to mind my own business when I saw him. I thought he would have moved out of Chicago by now, but there he was. He had his dreads pulled back, the strobe lights bounced off his dark skin, and I could recognize that smile anywhere. He was with his new boyfriend, and I wanted to say that I was happy for him, but that should have been me whispering sweet nothings in his ear.

 Why did Marcus have to turn around and see me? Why did my ex have to chuckle as he waved to me? Why did I feel the need to walk over to him? We didn’t need to have a conversation. We had plenty of words to say to each other when we broke up almost two years ago.

 He looked me up and down. “You’re still doing the whole male dancer gig?” he asked. I could hear the disappointment in his voice.

 “Sorry to disappoint you, Marcus. We can’t all just go into the field we love,” I said. I was already over talking to him.

 He gave me a stern look. “I never told you to drop out of college. I thought you needed to stop after everything that happened with your brother,” he said.

 I turned to his new boyfriend. I saw he was wearing a flamingo shirt, and I wanted to punch him instantly.  “I’d rather not put my business out there for everyone to know.”

 “Why? You already have your whole body out for display,” the flamingo boy said. He turned to Marcus and gave him a desperate kiss. “I’ll give you two some time to talk.” He walked away before we could respond.

 “He seems nice. Is he from Florida?” I asked.

 Marcus raised an eyebrow. “Why do you ask?”

 I shook my head and took a sip of my drink. “No reason.”

 “I get that you’re still mad at the world for your brother dying so suddenly, but you don’t get to be a dick to everyone else about it.”

 “I’m only a dick about it when people tell me that I shouldn’t cry about it, that I needed to get on with my life, and act like nothing happened,” I said. I still remember when I got the phone call that my brother died of a brain aneurysm. I had been a complete mess for a month, and Marcus was sympathetic for a short time before he told me I needed to move forward.

 “Sorry, I don’t want you sleeping around, drinking yourself to death, and making a joke of your life. Are you even writing?” he asked.

 I couldn’t tell him the truth that I had looked at a blank piece of paper wanting to just get my feelings out. “Yes, I write all the time. I will have you know, that I’m currently finishing up some short stories to send off to publication.”

 He crossed his arms. “You do understand that I can see right through your bullshit.”

 I felt my phone go off. I bent down to pull it out from my shoe. It was a notification from Grindr. A guy at the bar thought I was cute, and he wanted to take me home. I looked up to see him watching me. “I have better things to do then continue this conversation.”

 “Enjoy having meaningless sex with someone. You’re making your brother proud.”

 I looked at Marcus with so much hate in my chest for him right then. “You don’t get to judge me for fucking anything. I get to deal with shit my own way. Sorry, I’m not heartless like you. If you want to call me out on my shit, look at yourself.” I turned and pointed at flamingo boy. “Isn’t this your fourth boyfriend in the last two years?” I shrugged. “Can’t seem to keep a guy around.” I turned to leave.

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About the author:
Zachary Ryan grew up in a black-and-white box in Maryland, before moving to Chicago to start a new life. There, he found that he was accepted for his misfit status—and learned that it’s perfectly normal to spend your twenties feeling lost and confused.

After a disastrous sexual encounter, Ryan stumbled on a group of true friends, or “soul cluster,” that he connected with. Through his writing, he hopes to help other broken souls out there find comfort amid the chaos.

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